>>cue rock music and women in very tight and very frayed jean boyshorts and large fake tits in bras cut out in the star spangled banner.
This something I though of a while ago when all that business in "Eye-Rak" was going on and words like "fallujah tikrit mossul" were considered hot stuff by news anchors.
And recently I saw this:
Let us assume that poster was most definitely made by an American. This is obviously some attempt to get back at the usual "american women are fat, europeans are hot" type gag. The chicks on the left are actually the Europeans.
Now, possibly, that outline on the right is the South American
continent. And the one on the left (and that is much worse) is only
Texas. First conclusion, Americans suck at geography. Not just international but local as well.
It may sound like a stereotype, but all stereotypes have a certain amount of truth to them.
For the Average Typical American, the world is divided as follows: his town, his state, New York aka the centre of the world, the U.S.A aka the whole of America which is found on the periphery of the centre of the world, Canada and its homosexuals at the top, Mexico and its aliens beneath. and that strange and mysterious country called Foreign (state code: FN). (props to Douglas Adams for this Foreign bit)
It was probably observed by American leaders in the first world war, that the Average Typical American opened up a bit to the rest of the world. A faraway place that's being bombed to bits and has fellow americans dying in it is always more interesting that just a faraway place with little bombing and only the inhabitants of Foreign getting blown up.
And this paved the way for a new and exciting method of teaching international geography to the Great American Nation:
Wars.
>>cue some dramatical music. the stuff from Pearl Harbor will do ok.
Now, there is a great deal more of Foreign respective to New York so the US leaders made the wise decision not to wage war against the whole of it at the same time. It wasn't that it would be tactically difficult, at least not from the point of New Yorkers, it was only that the amount of geographical information would be far too great to assimilate in one go.
The US leaders even more wisely decided to go by the also wise and time and again proven principles of Jeopardy. Whereby the small and insignificant bits of trivia are the one that make you richer.
For this reasons, seemingly small and insignificant parts of Foreign like Cuba, Grenada or Vietnam are chosen to be warred at and maximise the geographical moola.
It hasn't been totally successful though. I still have no idea where the Balkans are. probably because Clinton was a democrat.
Notes:
- All of the above may be true. satire may not be intended.
- American is a misnomer. they should be called USAians.
- I only wrote all this because I needed something to write on xanga...
- It is commonly thought that all major military conflicts the
United Stares have been involved in in the past century have been
orchestrated by screenwriters so that they could have some real life
background to include in their stories. This could also be true
- If you live in a small remote part of Foreign, beware, you could be the next military target of the USAians and their New Yorkers.
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